Archive for January 2014

You Know Me


Although one could usually find me saying otherwise, I'm glad that I'm not stubbornly trying to tape my life together into what it "should" be.  If life's going to be a mess at times, at least hopefully it will be less often of my own doing.  God's always known my heart and where to cut with His surgeon's scalpel, and when you let Him do His work you come out stronger, at peace, and you can keep your eyes cleared for how the past truly was in light of His expert schema...

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Snapshots

- Entering Seattle while Macklemore comes on the radio.

- Little kids at the volunteering site reminding me of Raya.  Way too excited, but that's a good thing.

- Driving over the bridge from Seattle, just before rush hour, and being able to drive a little slow to sneak glimpses of the watercolors of the sound.

- Whipping up chocolate chip cookies in 30 minutes like a boss.

- Praying with a new friend.

- Making the most of the day.  Hectic, but productive in many aspects.

- Possibilities.

Don't Think Twice, It's Alright

I suppose it's true - you will continue to miss someone until one day you just don't.  One day, you just forget that you haven't thought about them in the past 24 hours.  There's no itch, just a small scar.

Apparently he's found someone else.  I've been waiting for this "moment" since the moment we walked away.  And now that it's happened... it's okay, it really is.  I'm okay, in a way that I wouldn't have expected.  In the "I don't need to repeat it to myself like a mantra" okay.  It's time.

Writing doesn't go in my favor

I've been trying to write these application essays for ages now, but my writing cortex never seems to want to focus.

I'll be trying to outline why I want to help people, and my fingers will itch to list down all the never-ending reasons why it didn't work out between us.

Once I begin explaining my character-shaping experiences, I want to be honest and say how this whole pre-med process ripped my intellectual confidence in half.

What do I want to do in the future?  How about just end up with a career that proves I didn't waste my time?

Why would I be a good candidate for this school?  Because if I actually knew I had a chance, maybe I would be able to prove myself for once.

You'll learn

credit: Josef Williams

Way back in the day, pilots used to let the kids on board have a little tour of the cockpit.  I remember being amazed at all the contraptions and asking (rather stupidly, to be honest): "Is it hard?"
The pilot just smiled at me and asked in turn, "Do you know how to read?"
"Yes."
"Well, once you learn how to fly, it's as easy as reading the alphabet."

Go away

"You" need to stop popping into my dreams at random.  You have had nothing to do with my life, and thus have nothing to do with my brain recycling the soup of information from the day and consolidating it for storage.

#neurosciencemajor